All of us have gone down roads in life at times and realized later that we were going the wrong way; I’ve done this more than a few times. It wasn’t pleasant to admit it, but it was right and liberating to do so.

Recently one gentleman has publicly shared his own journey in four installments on his blog at www.upsaid.com/re4med. Following is a portion of what he wrote. His site contains other helpful material and is commended to you. His name is William F. Hill Jr., and what follows is reprinted with his permission. PH)

Within the last few months, I believe God has been working on my heart and my conscience in a matter that I am about to share. Please understand that these thoughts I am sharing are not "organized," nor are they polished in any way. These are simply my thoughts as it pertains to the subject matter. For those who know me personally they will likely not be surprised to see these words in print. Perhaps some will, but however I am perceived after writing these thoughts, please understand that I do not share these thoughts lightly nor do they come without days and hours of thought and reflection.

I believe there is a serious problem in the Protestant church today. I have been and am growing more concerned that this problem, if left unchecked and examined and diagnosed for what it is, will leave the Church of Christ anemic and damaged. This problem is that of the ease upon which people leave godly churches, (not perfect) and join with another communion (or start another church) for the sake of their "ideals" or "ways to do ministry" or "preferences" or whatever sounds good. In some cases I have heard some people offer their reasons as being "God told me...” or "God led me..." Yet I wonder, why? Further, how can one validate the notion that God actually "led them" to do so in the first place? Further still, how can one even challenge such a notion? It seems rather unclear to me. In some cases people have offered their reasons for leaving doctrinally sound churches, (again, not perfect) because the church they were attending was somehow violating their "conscience". Again, how can one understand this and how is one to challenge this view? After all, a person’s conscience can only be captive to the word of God rightly understood. What if a "weaker brother" has a wrong or incorrect understanding of Scripture on a matter and wrongly applies it to his given situation? There is no guarantee that because a person argues that they left a church over a matter of conscience that they are correct in doing so. As sinful man, our consciences are also sinful, and in this we often err. So let me ask: when can a person legitimately leave a communion that is doctrinally sound (not perfect) and join elsewhere? Are there ever times when we are allowed to do so? I am beginning to have serious doubts as to the validity of those who think they can.

Please keep in mind that in these thoughts I am discussing churches that are sound in theology and sound in doctrine. I am not arguing that people should remain in theologically inept communions or, for that matter, apostate ones. What I am asking and seeking is the correct understanding of church in light of God's providential working in placing people in churches. Do we have a duty to labor where we are placed (for a lifetime, if necessary) or do we have a right to simply walk away when things get rough or it appears that we will never change the minds of those around us? I would argue that American church goers in general have become so individualistic in their thinking about this matter that they are quick to answer, "Yes". However one only has to look at the Protestant Reformation of the 16th century to see that the reformers in no way desired a schism nor did they desire to start a new "church". What they desired was to see the Roman Catholic Church repent of apostasy. This was their hearts’ desire. People today, however, leave their doctrinally sound churches for reasons that fall far short of this. They leave over disagreements in "application" instead of differences in "doctrine". Certainly application is necessary and without it doctrine would be useless; however, there are often times that people split hairs over application and leave churches unnecessarily.

How are we ever to impact our world with the truth if we are so easily fragmenting and leaving those we say we love and those we were providentially called to labor among? This needs to stop.

My mind is daily dealing with this matter, realizing that what I am saying will not be popular or rub people the right way. The fact is, that even in my own life I have been part of the problem. I also have left churches for reasons that, in retrospect, were not worth dividing the church over, nor were they worth breaking fellowship for.

I am grateful for the article titled: "Church Hopping" by Chris Schlect. I will be using it as a springboard to my comments throughout this post.

When are people allowed to leave a church that they have committed to serving and laboring within? Are there ever viable times and reasons for people to leave and attend elsewhere? Can these be identified? I think they can.

First, God's people are allowed to leave to join with another communion when He has providentially called them to relocate due to work or other matters providentially orchestrated. Of course this is really not "leaving" the church. It is simply a "transfer" to another congregation and in this the elders of both churches should rejoice to see God at work in the lives of His people. Yet some will say, "What if the move is not necessary"? I would suggest that in these times that discussion with the elders of the current work would be an important guide to ascertaining the need for the move. Any move that comes under the direct and clear permission of the elders cannot be seen as being divisive. This course of action simply allows one to stay under the umbrella of headship that God has established for His church. Another case where a person is allowed to leave is when they have the clear and direct blessing of the elders for doing so. Each person must judge what this means, to some extent, but common sense makes it rather simple. If the elders send a person out to join with another congregation, this action should be friendly and without friction. Yet many leave churches today without this "blessing" and the result of such action is turmoil and heartache. A lack of action by the elders does not always equate to "blessing," and in that we must be very careful. The elders may not stop you, but this in no way means that you are "permitted".

Second, a person is allowed to leave a church when clear doctrinal differences affecting the major tenets of the faith exist that are of an irreconcilable nature. Here is where most people usually confuse practice with orthodoxy. Orthodoxy must precede orthopraxy. However, many people make illegitimate leaps towards practice, and in that create a rule of orthodoxy. This is backwards. Orthodoxy must lead to good orthopraxy necessarily. However, far too often people create a new theology because they are reversing this issue. There are any number of issues facing the church that would illustrate this most clearly. Some of these issues are homeschooling, courtship, age-segregated Sunday schools, youth groups (or the lack of them), modesty, women working, birth control (or the lack of it), etc. There are no prescribed rules in Scripture that require that people follow them according to some rule someone has made. For example, God has not prescribed homeschooling as the cure all for our cultural problems, (that is the job of the Lord Jesus and the church militant). He has mandated the full and complete weight of responsibility to the fathers and heads of households in this matter, and in that we should be humbled and in awe. However, we should not be leaving our local fellowships as a result of these kinds of matters that are mere preferences and practice, especially if the church is not discouraging people from following their conscience in these matters. No, we must leave only when the current congregation is apostate or has so clearly left fundamental and clear tenets of biblical orthodoxy. Anything less violates the covenantal relationship that God places people into and calls them to labor within. If you feel strongly that these "practical" issues are vitally critical then labor where you are placed to seek reform. Leaving will not fix it.

Third, leaving is allowed when staying would force one to sin. This is where most people will play the "my conscience says this or that" card. Yet our conscience cannot be captured to unbiblical requirements or, for that matter, man-made rules of application. Our conscience can only be captured by the Word of God rightly understood. If you are mishandling Scripture and claim that your conscience is being "held captive" to it, then your captivity is your own fault. It is not God who placed this burden on you. It is your own poor understanding of Scripture. I would caution people to be very careful how they apply this aspect. Further, the key word in this third option is "forced". Most people are not forced to sin when they stay in churches that do not "see” it their way or "do” it their way. Most simply use this as a convenient excuse to grant themselves permission to leave and do what they want anyhow. For example, I have yet to be a part of a church that refused to allow me to homeschool. They may have seen other viable options to education, but they in no way told me I cannot homeschool. Thus I cannot legitimately accuse this church of forcing me to sin. Some will object and say that in some churches they are made to feel "isolated", as a result of their views. I would suggest that one can only feel this way if you allow it. If this is truly happening, leaving will not fix it; only following biblical requirements for conflict resolution will.

These are hard words -- words that strike deeply into my own heart and soul. Yet this issue is serious. God's people need to wake up. The “family” is not the bride of Christ -- the Church is.

Almost one year ago today, an event happened at a Reformed and Presbyterian church that I was a member. The details of the event are not critical to this discussion, but what can be said was that it resulted in some leaders and families leaving this church in order to start a new work in order to conform to their preferences. They left over issues of preference and not issues vital to the faith. The church I was attending was not apostate nor was it even close. In fact, it was and remains today, a strong church theologically. Certainly it is and was not always everything it should be, but it is working to always seek God’s best for the sheep that attend her. It must be said from the outset that this new work was not a work of that church nor was it approved by the elders of said church. When this event took place, the elders wrote a pastoral letter to the congregation instructing us to not follow those that left and that those that left were doing so of their own free volition and not due to support from or by the elders. They further availed themselves to us all to answer questions as best they were able. It was a difficult time for us all.

As a result of many matters, I chose to set aside my vows and disregard the directives of my God-ordained elders in this matter. I refused to humbly adhere to the advice offered by them. I refused instruction from good friends who cautioned me to carefully think this matter through. I was rebellious. Over the course of the last year and due in no small part to this matter, I came to realize my own sin in this issue. I am biblically called to be in submission to the authorities God places over me. I am called to submit to my elders. I had a God-given responsibility to both listen to them and obey them in this matter. I refused. I rebelled. I was in sin. May God forgive me for this action and begin to heal His church for the heartache that this split has caused so many people.

We are Christians. We are united to one another and we are to live in harmony with one another because of the fellowship we have in Christ. We are to work for unity as often as we can, and in areas we disagree, we are to be charitable, working and laboring together for the glory of God and His church, especially as it pertains to secondary doctrines and matters. We are not called to divide. We are called to love. Love does not seek its own. Love does not desire its own way. Love desires the good of the body and the unity of this most precious work God has given us -- His church; His bride. For me this is what brings me the greatest regret as I look back over the last year. The attitudes I carried and the actions I demonstrated presented something that is sinful. May God, in His great grace forgive me for this action and may He work to bring others to a place of repentance over this matter.