At least there was this unity until Prag started attending The Perfect Marriage Workshop on Thursday nights. Led by a gifted lady named Phar who was a little younger than Prag and Prin, she had been doing The Perfect Marriage Workshop for about five years. Prag attended the workshops alone since Prin was busy some evenings with homeschooling responsibilities for their younger three children.

The more Prag attended the workshops, the more he realized how his marriage was in trouble. He also realized it was Prin who needed to change, if ever things were going to be the way they were supposed to be.

For example, Prag was concerned that his wife and he did not agree on physical exercise. Prin was a jogger. She loved to run early in the morning while everyone else slept. She enjoyed the quiet of that time and used it to pray and think about her day as she ran. But Prag did not want his wife to run; instead, he wanted her to walk and do resistance training. Phar had pointed out two verses from Proverbs to support Prag’s desire: Proverbs 19:2b clearly condemned jogging: “…and he that hasteth with his feet sinneth” and Proverbs 31:17 clearly commanded lifting weights: “She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.” Prin listened to her husband’s admonitions and wondered to herself if the real dumbbell was to whom he’d been talking, and not what he was trying to get her to start using. Prin agreed to submit to Prag if that was what he wanted, but she didn’t see things as he did. One night they discussed this for three hours but never reached an agreement; on other occasions they would discuss it as well, and at the conclusion of every discussion, Prag would always look kindly at Prin and tenderly say, “I want you to know, I really love you.”

Another thing Prag learned at The Perfect Marriage Workshop was that his wife had terrible taste in music; if it wasn’t soon corrected, it was going to destroy their family. Prin enjoyed different types of music, but sometimes she especially enjoyed listening to jazz. Again, this was a definite no-no; Psalm 100:1 says, “Make a joyful noise…” and everyone knew that there’s not much joy in jazz at times, and too much of this playing softly on the radio in the kitchen while Prin prepared dinner might trigger Uz and Buz to go do drugs. Prin acknowledged that jazz, as well as other types of music, needed to be listened to with discernment, but to suppose that her liking it was harmful to their marriage and family was silly. She feared Prag was listening more to Phar teaching her preferences than any clear precept being violated from God’s Word. Prag and Prin discussed musical tastes often; Prin was willing to submit to Prag if she had to, but she could never agree with him. This left Prag very frustrated; he wanted the perfect marriage, he wanted everything to be just like Phar said it had to be; he was miserable that their marriage was so horrible. Still, at the end of every music discussion, he’d look kindly at Prin and tenderly say, “I want you to know, I really love you.”

Of course Prin would always respond that she loved him also, and sensing how frustrated he was some evenings, she’d do everything she could to make their lovemaking good for him. Before they fell asleep, lying in his arms, she’d pray silently for their marriage, her husband’s anxiety, and that she would be a better wife.

Even though she prayed and studied materials Prag gave her, she never became convinced of all the perfect things they needed to do in order to have Phar’s idea of the perfect marriage. While there was disagreement with Prag, nothing could have prepared Prin for what he did next. He planned an evening out for just the two of them; over dinner that evening, Prin knew that Prag was going to tell her he was committed to making their marriage work no matter what, and she was anxious to let him know she felt the same way. Instead, Prag acted very uncomfortable and hesitant, until finally he blurted out, “Prin, I think you and I need to separate.”

Prin couldn’t believe her ears! This was the opposite of what she expected. Her shock quickly became a sickening knot in her stomach. She was numb to everything going on around her. Prag continued, “You have to realize that I can’t in good conscience continue to be married to a jazz listening jogger.” Prin was speechless then and through most of the evening, as she listened to Prag go on and on, justifying his decision. Finally, when he was finished with his explanations, he looked in Prin’s eyes and tenderly said, “I want you to know, I really love you.” Hearing this, Prin rushed to the ladies room, found an empty stall, and threw up what little she had eaten that evening.

In the days that followed, Prin tried to discuss the matter with Prag. She’d remind him of their wedding vows. She’d go over the Biblical grounds for divorce. She’d suggest they get counseling. Sometimes it seemed that Prag was weakening in his resolve, but being with Phar or attending another workshop would have him as resolute as ever.

Prin also explained to Prag that just because he was following his conscience, his conviction of what he thought was right, did not mean he was right. For some reason, Prag never got this; he acted like, if something was his conviction, therefore everyone ought to respect it, and not to respect it was failure to show Christian love.

Prin appealed to Prag’s mom who lived across town and with whom she had always thought she had a special relationship. But this also was to no avail; in no uncertain terms, she let Prin know that her Praggy needed to be happy, and that Prin should not stand in his way, but do the loving thing and encourage everything along.

Prin also explained to Prag that this was setting a bad example for the children. His divorcing her was sending the message to the children that one doesn’t have to follow principle, but that one can be pragmatic whenever one wants. They were being taught to do as they please instead of persevering even when it might be painful for a time.

Prin’s arguments were good, her attitude gracious, without giving in to what she believed was wrong and foolish on the part of her husband. Their children knew where she stood, but she tried not to be ugly about their father to them, even though more than once she would have loved to use Uz’s and Buz’s baseball bats on his thick skull.

A few months passed; Prag moved out and Uz and Buz went to live with him. After the divorce was final, Prag and Phar got married. Prin wondered how Prag could justify this, but she guessed it all had to do with conscience.

Angry for a while, Prin soon found herself feeling sorry for Prag and Phar. Sometimes, she’d see them around town, and they would speak in passing; sometimes they’d come over to take the girls out or attend their birthday party or piano recital. At first it was a little awkward, but Prin got on with life. Still, one thing that did not change and which made her feel even more sorry for Prag in his blindness was, whenever he’d leave these events, he’d still look at Prin and say. “I want you to know, I really love you.”